Proof of Life.

It was pointed out to me by my mentor, Jill, that my last post about my chronic condition being my full-time job was good, but missing a critical element – the connection between what I’m doing to take care of myself, and the reasons I have to. I am not just a victim of a random disease […]

Con-formation.

[kon-fawr-mey-shuh n] noun: the arrangement of the parts of an object; the act or state of conforming, or acting in accordance or harmony with prevailing standards, norms, or behaviors; one of the configurations of a molecule that can easily change its shape and can consequently exist in equilibrium with molecules of different configuration. We are […]

The Best Defense…

Protective coloring. Personal camouflage. Adaptations. Defense mechanisms. All things designed to protect and deflect. The dictionary defines camouflage in nature as the defensive reaction of an organism, using a combination of materials or coloration for concealment, either by making animals or objects hard to see or by disguising them as something else. Animals and insects also […]

Body Language.

One of my favorite novels is by Jean Hanff Korelitz. Titled, You Should Have Known, it’s about a family therapist/psychologist who has recently written a book that describes the relationship theory she has come to after years of practice: namely, that people share who they are with others in a hundred different ways. From the […]

Crossing the Border.

A recent horoscope I read (Rob Brezsny is amazing, look him up!) advised me to use caution as “you gear up for your rite of passage or metaphorical border crossing.” I usually love Brezsny’s horoscopes but this one really caught my attention because of the sheer number of role changes, rites of passage, and crossings […]

At the Corner of Crazy and Codependent.

This really counts as a follow up to my post, “Emotional Survivalist,” because the two subjects are so related – unhealthy ways of being in relationship that I am really good at! Nobody knows exactly who coined the word, “codependent,” but Melody Beattie brought it into common usage in the seventies. It was originally used […]

Put the”Body” Back in “Mindfulness!”

How often have we been told, “You should just slow down and breathe,” or, “to feel better, just tune in to your body and then do what it is telling you,” or, “Being mindful will help you feel less stressed.” (And by the way, the word, “mindful,” meaning focusing on getting back into your body, […]

RAge, Part 2.

“The inability to process and express feelings effectively, and the tendency to serve the needs of others before even considering one’s own, are common patterns in people who develop chronic illness.” Gabor Mate, When the Body Says No. This one sentence describes me to a T. As a child, I struggled at all times to […]

RAge.

In 1946, a John Hopkins study showed that cancer patients tend to deny and repress conflictual emotions and impulses to a higher degree than do other people. Gabor Mate, author of, When the Body Says No, indicates that there may be a cancer type; those who have difficulty expressing anger may be more prone to […]

In Video Veritas.

Have you ever played – or watched someone play – that kind of adventure video game where you collect items and skills and powers as the game meanders on? You, as your character, can only actually see the parts of a structure or landscape that you’ve already explored and mapped, and you can wander around […]