Proof of Life.

It was pointed out to me by my mentor, Jill, that my last post about my chronic condition being my full-time job was good, but missing a critical element – the connection between what I’m doing to take care of myself, and the reasons I have to. I am not just a victim of a random disease […]

Con-formation.

[kon-fawr-mey-shuh n] noun: the arrangement of the parts of an object; the act or state of conforming, or acting in accordance or harmony with prevailing standards, norms, or behaviors; one of the configurations of a molecule that can easily change its shape and can consequently exist in equilibrium with molecules of different configuration. We are […]

Crossing the Border.

A recent horoscope I read (Rob Brezsny is amazing, look him up!) advised me to use caution as “you gear up for your rite of passage or metaphorical border crossing.” I usually love Brezsny’s horoscopes but this one really caught my attention because of the sheer number of role changes, rites of passage, and crossings […]

A Lame of Inches.

I’m not a huge sports fan but I do enjoy football and I often listen to it on the radio. The other day, I heard someone reference the saying about football being a game of inches, although I think sports fans would argue that success or failure in most sports can come down to inches. […]

A Rose by Any Other Name…

V came to me the other day and informed me that she wants to change her last name. She knows I chose my own name and she wanted to know what the procedure was for doing it, and how one picked a name that would harmoniously go with one’s first name, which is, of course, […]

Chronic Relationships.

It can be a very valuable practice to put yourself in your partners’ or loved ones’ shoes and imagine what you are like to live with – then ask yourself whether you could live with you. Think of all your quirks, obsessions, desires, demands, patterns, projections, emotions, problems, past experiences, and expectations. How you deal (or […]

Emotional Survivalism.

I am an emotional survivalist. I am not making preparations for the end-times, don’t live in a bunker, and don’t hoard canned food and batteries. What makes me a survivalist is my historic ability to live on the barest minimum of emotional nourishment. I have a history of taking whatever small amounts of love, support, […]

Put the”Body” Back in “Mindfulness!”

How often have we been told, “You should just slow down and breathe,” or, “to feel better, just tune in to your body and then do what it is telling you,” or, “Being mindful will help you feel less stressed.” (And by the way, the word, “mindful,” meaning focusing on getting back into your body, […]

Enough is Enough.

I’ve been in pain to a greater or lesser degree since I was twenty-one: stabbing knee pain, immobile, sore shoulders, stiff and painful feet, aching hips, etc. So you can imagine my dismay when I started developing migraines on top of the RA. They started after I got in a car accident bad enough to […]

Extroverted Introversion.

When V was little, her dad and I often took her to the playground to play. Invariably, we would get there and get settled, and then her dad would tell her to go ahead and go up to the other kids and start playing with them. This is something parents seem to do all of […]