The Green Fuse.

Sitting on my patio, I noticed a green shoot of something that did not look like a blueberry bush, growing out of the wooden planter containing the blueberry bush that I planted in April. On closer inspection, it proved to be a tomato plant, which puzzled me greatly until I remembered that last summer, this pot had […]

Proof of Life.

It was pointed out to me by my mentor, Jill, that my last post about my chronic condition being my full-time job was good, but missing a critical element – the connection between what I’m doing to take care of myself, and the reasons I have to. I am not just a victim of a random disease […]

Con-formation.

[kon-fawr-mey-shuh n] noun: the arrangement of the parts of an object; the act or state of conforming, or acting in accordance or harmony with prevailing standards, norms, or behaviors; one of the configurations of a molecule that can easily change its shape and can consequently exist in equilibrium with molecules of different configuration. We are […]

The Best Defense…

Protective coloring. Personal camouflage. Adaptations. Defense mechanisms. All things designed to protect and deflect. The dictionary defines camouflage in nature as the defensive reaction of an organism, using a combination of materials or coloration for concealment, either by making animals or objects hard to see or by disguising them as something else. Animals and insects also […]

Crossing the Border.

A recent horoscope I read (Rob Brezsny is amazing, look him up!) advised me to use caution as “you gear up for your rite of passage or metaphorical border crossing.” I usually love Brezsny’s horoscopes but this one really caught my attention because of the sheer number of role changes, rites of passage, and crossings […]

Betting on the Flip.

Heads or tails. Right or left. Buy or Sell. Sign or don’t sign. Begin or don’t begin. End or continue. Stay or go. I’ve been reflecting lately on how we can be going along, living our lives, when we are suddenly presented with a choice to do something very different – or keep things as […]

The Hummingbird Hierarchy.

I don’t know if this happens to other people (though I suspect it does), but I’ll be going along believing something about the world and myself and how everything works, and I’ll have been doing some reading, or thinking, or self-exploration – and I’ll realize something might not be or work the way I thought […]

At the Corner of Crazy and Codependent.

This really counts as a follow up to my post, “Emotional Survivalist,” because the two subjects are so related – unhealthy ways of being in relationship that I am really good at! Nobody knows exactly who coined the word, “codependent,” but Melody Beattie brought it into common usage in the seventies. It was originally used […]

Emotional Survivalism.

I am an emotional survivalist. I am not making preparations for the end-times, don’t live in a bunker, and don’t hoard canned food and batteries. What makes me a survivalist is my historic ability to live on the barest minimum of emotional nourishment. I have a history of taking whatever small amounts of love, support, […]

Put the”Body” Back in “Mindfulness!”

How often have we been told, “You should just slow down and breathe,” or, “to feel better, just tune in to your body and then do what it is telling you,” or, “Being mindful will help you feel less stressed.” (And by the way, the word, “mindful,” meaning focusing on getting back into your body, […]