At the Corner of Crazy and Codependent.

This really counts as a follow up to my post, “Emotional Survivalist,” because the two subjects are so related – unhealthy ways of being in relationship that I am really good at! Nobody knows exactly who coined the word, “codependent,” but Melody Beattie brought it into common usage in the seventies. It was originally used […]

The Life-Changing Magic of Not Cluttering Shit Up in the First Place.

While Dad was still living alone, not only did his house start to fall apart, but he also filled it with junk: hoarded 2-liter recyclable pop bottles, food containers, and paper – including both the contents and the corresponding envelope of every piece of mail that entered the house. He also stashed food, afraid he […]

Emotional Survivalism.

I am an emotional survivalist. I am not making preparations for the end-times, don’t live in a bunker, and don’t hoard canned food and batteries. What makes me a survivalist is my historic ability to live on the barest minimum of emotional nourishment. I have a history of taking whatever small amounts of love, support, […]

Driving Lessons.

As a step-mom, you have to be careful not to overstep your boundaries with the real mom; life is a constant negotiation, with strategic planning taking place around many things. V’s mom emigrated here with her mother from the Ukraine; she has her priorities and perspectives and they don’t often match anyone else’s. She and […]

July 1938 – May 2016.

I got the call last Thursday at 11; Dad had taken a turn for the worse and Greg thought my sister and I should come over soon. Having just come from the gym, I rushed through getting ready and got on the road a short time later. When I got to his room, my sister was […]

Put the”Body” Back in “Mindfulness!”

How often have we been told, “You should just slow down and breathe,” or, “to feel better, just tune in to your body and then do what it is telling you,” or, “Being mindful will help you feel less stressed.” (And by the way, the word, “mindful,” meaning focusing on getting back into your body, […]